Changing Rooms
Unlike my other posts.. this one is a bit different... just a small bitch session..
Everyone knows what a changing room is. No, it is not some fancy TV show. I am talking about rooms commonly found in a swimming complex, Gym etc.. I guess you can also call it, "the locker" room.
Yeah, so what about it you... you ask..
I HATE CHANGING ROOMS.
Don't know what it is like inside a ladies changing room, but I have to say... I don't like to use changing rooms. I get out of there as quick as possible.
I go to the gym almost everyday and it is an ordeal for me to use the changing rooms.. why... here is why...
Everytime I go in there... there is almost always a bald, fat toad, shaped like a barrel, with a sleazy look on his face.. walking around naked. For fuck sake, do you have to use a hair dryer on that bald head of yours with one hand, scratching your arse with the other, standing in front of the full length mirror.. NAKED.
Yesterday, the room was quiet. Was a public holiday in the land of the long white cloud (ANZAC day). All the lockers are lined up in rows, facing each other with space to change inbetween. Of all the places, the above mentioned freak, had to stand in front of me to change... and for some reason.. he had the urge to bend down in front and stay that way for what felt like eternity. Oh and BTW Did I mention he had stripped.. and was totally naked... YUCK.
May be it is because I was bought up in a conservative setting, I am just not used to walking around naked in front of other guys (don't think I ever will). I am not ashamed of my body in ANY way. I though it was an achievement when I could stand in front of others only with the bare essentials, i.e. undies.. naked.. No way... not in a million years.
SO, for all of you balding barrels who are looking for a good time in a locker room..for crying out loud, PLEASE coverup.. and NO, I am not interested in looking at your droopy arse.. or your half inch penis or how many folds you have on your tummy or how you look like when you try and reach for your toes without bending at your knees!!!!!!!
Is it just me, or does this happen to everyone?
You may ask, "why the fuck do you still use it"?... well I have to.. have to use it to take a shower before I get to work from the gym... I might get weird looks if I get to work after a workout, without taking a shower...
Any comments?
posted by momok @ 4:00 PM
8 Comments:
Hello momok, I was just coming to see if you've posted something new... and hahaha don't feel bad, it's perfectly normal for you to feel that way because it's actually the same in the ladies changing room - probably not AS BAD, but I've definitely seen way too many naked women than I liked. And you're right, it all depends on what you're used to, and most ladies don't expose themselves so COMPLETELY in changing rooms but there are always some that just don't give a toss and take off all their clothes and march around. I hate seeing naked women too so... don't worry I think your reaction is perfectly normal!
I wnet shopping last weekend and wanted to try on a dress. Went into the 'changing room' but there were no cubicles, it was just a room with mirrors on the wall so you just had to strip down and try on whatever.
I saw enough saggy wrinkled boobs to and cellulite riddled jiggly thighs...ugh..the torture!
With regard to your problem; I'm not sure if you will like this idea but I guarantee you, it will work. Next time to dude bends over in front of you, do a slow appreciative wolf whistle. If he;s a straight guy, trust me he'll never do that again with you. If you want to avoid naked people walking around you, you should gaze at them in an obvious manner (bonus points for slowly running your tongue along your lower lip, that is perfecto sleazebag). Next time they'll always think "shit, I better wear my towel in case that homo-brown guy is going to be there!"
Hey it will get the job done and give you a laugh!
Hannah :- Thank you and I am glad I am not the only one who feels this way. I really don't mind looking at naked ladies (selective).. it is just the guys that I just can't handle.. if I were Gay, I would have the time of my life.. every day. hahahah
Darwin :- Hahahahaha.. couldn't stop laughing. Great idea by the way.. it just might work.. only draw back is.. if he were gay.. I am screwed.. in more than one way!!!!
I'd like to open your head and see how your brain works.. it is brilliant.
Momok
Hehehe Darwin's idea is sooo cool, but if you adopted her suggestion you might attract some unwanted attention momok, hahaha.
momok you are back!
hows it going? hows the weekend? guess what? I am going to start biking! havent done it in eons so chances are i'l suck.
I do like Darwins idea. I reckon you should go for it..and just by chance he turns out to be gay..well so what..take it like a man..who knows, you might just like it.
That would open up whole new doors ;)
And suddenly, all these horrible memories of high school gym class come flooding back...
I feel for ya, man.
Hey Venus, I like Darwins' idea.. but I am not game to follow through and I absolutely DO NOT want to open any "doors"!!!!
What do you mean, i'm back.. never did go anywhere!!!
Biking ha... Have fun.. it is like walking, u never forget...you should have gone with me.. would have shown you what real biking is... mountain biking is the best there is... loads of hard work.. but I keep grinning at the end... come back... puleeesssss.. I misss you heaps...
If I won Lotto, I will give you as much as you need to find a cure for cancer.. one condition though.. you have to be here...
Christopher:- I am sorry that your trauma started that early!!! Childhood trauma is hard to get over... I feel for you too dude!!!
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