Common Friends

I am very much a single guy at the moment, some of my readers know, some may not, some may not care!

I used to be in a serious relationship a couple of years ago.  The key words being "USED TO".  I enjoy being single and wonder why, I ever was in a relationship.  Did have its' good times and not so good times.

One major problem with relatioship is common friends.  Your friends become her friends and hers become yours.  The problem starts when you breakup.  Some of these common friends now, are stuck in the middle.  No reason to choose one over the other, but still, some prefer to do so.  

One friend in particular that I was close to is closer to my ex at the moment.  I have no issues with it, what so ever.  Another fact that I have to throw into the equation is that my ex is geting married end of next month.  Happy for her that she has moved onn and is having a happy life.  

We do stay in touch, but I keep away as much as I can! I say hi & bye when I run into her in town, but make no effort otherwise! No surprises there!!!  I'm the sort of guy who dosn't want to offend anyone! 

I'm not sure how to make her understand (my ex) that i've moved onn 
and though we might  be friends, we can't be like "normal" friends!  That dosn't stop her from moaning every time we happen to meet that I am avoiding her! ofcourse I am, what did you expect?

But here is the craziest thing!

This commin friend, who is doing most of the organising for my exs' wedding, just asked me if I could driving my ex & her new husband to their hotel suite on their wedding nite!

I've never been so insulted or fucked off ever, never like this.  There is insult & then INSULT!!!  Talk about kicking below the belt

Understandably common friends are confused about where they stand! Another thing that I have to mention is, all her friends r very good friends of mine, but not to her! She always held a belief that all her friends should make the effort of contacting her, ofcourse we all know how annoying that can be! As a flow onn effect- she has very few friends, if any!!!

Sounds like a bitch session, I know! But  I was sooo fucking mad at my friend, for the first time in my life, I gave her a piece of my mind.  I've never been more rude to anyone else, at least I don't think so.  Reminder to self - apologise!!!

Have you ever been in such a situation or had to deal with a "common friend"?  Perhaps you have a suggestion for me.  Anyone?



 

 In House Therapist


Its amazing how a small thing can be soo theraputic.

What you see above, is infact, yes, the very same Shrek that many people seem to "fear" in the movie, who we all end up adoring!

He has his own spot on my couch, as you can see, he usually sits where he is rite now.

Shrek was given to me as a gift from a very good friend of mine.

I am amazed at how many people find comfort in Shrek.  Soo much so, that when friends and family come home to visit, they take shrek in their arms and give him a cuddle.  Trust me, he feels real.

I have had soo many friends tell me about their problems after they have been holding Shrek for a while.  Everyone seem to find him soo comforting and relaxing.  A bit like unconditional love, not expecting anything in return but just be comforting and return a big warm smile.  Simple statement, but soo hard to follow!!!

I am not going to write what my friends say to me, but I though I would take a bit of my time and dedicate this post to my beloved Shrek, the day saver for many.. including me.

We all love you Shrek, you are special :-)

 

Tech-ED

For those of you who don't know what this is, it is a conference organised by Microsoft. Happens every year all over the world. Once in New Zealand (sold out). I was surprised to hear, that India has the most number of Tech Ed conferences in the world.. six per year and all of em sold out :-)

I was there this week and it was fun. As geeky as it seems and sounds, I did enjoy most of the presentations and upcomming "stuff" in IT. Some sound promising, enough to make my job easier, some.. just really kool... :-)

But i'm sure you are not interested in all the geekey stuff...

Part of tech ed is Tech Feast... the best part of it :-)

Had truck loads of food and alcohol was pouring out of the sky.. Nathan Haines, a well renouned Jazzist was performing live... and HE IS GOOD.. (guitar, Sax, Clarinet, flute.. you name it) and then there was the solo performance by our very own Sujatha Giri... daym she was good... just a guitar and her... she is real good.. im proud to be an India... and she just made me feel even better :-). Then there were commedians, president Gas.. and then last but not the least... featuring.. The Feelers... yeah baby... Feelers

Feelers Rock... I was in the "mosh pit".. and it felt good... I don't drink.. but all my mates were drunk.. but this was (recently) the most fun I have had with my pants onn... loved their performance and their songs...

If you ever get a chance don't miss it... looking forward to more fun in the comming months

More Weird Dreams !!! 

Some of you know that my background is in the IT field.  I do part time work co-ordinating (Audio & Visual) for GP (General Practitioner) meetings once a fortnite.  I did this last nite, and almost 99% of the time, the auditorium is full of qualified GP's and Specialist Consultants (except for me ofcourse).  Last nights topic was about Training and assessments for inters.

Towards the end, during question time, I asked my first question.  I asked a highly regarded Paediatric Consultant, if Medical training had the concept of "adaptive assessment", instead of just the standard.. ".. here are 100 questions, and answer them all"  kind of assessment.

 Unbeknown to me, this question stumped him!!!  

I rescued him by explaining what an adaptive assessment was and a fellow 
consultant answered the rest.

The consultant thanked me for making him aware of this assesment 
technique later.  Which I though was nice of him (mostly for not wanting to smack my head in!!!).

It wasn't my plan to stump him, but I was kinda surprised.  But that is not the point of this rambling.

I dreamt about it last nite and apparently I won an award for asking that question.  But I couldn't understand why I got a plate of "Lasagne" as the award!!!  I'm still wondering.

When I was in School in India, I had to walk through a remote road which cut through a forest.  I dream last nite that I was walking through that road again.  Half way through, there were five Lions sitting in a line.  One lion says.." Jeez, i'm thirsty, gimme some water.."  Without thinking this is weird, I pick up a plastic glass on the floor and go to a sink near by (where did that come from??) fill up the glass and pour the water into the lions mouth, one at a time.  All of them, except for one lion walk away.  The last one jumps and I splash some water on its mane.  Then is says.. "Jesus, now I am going to smell like a wet cat"... (imagine that in a Simba / Lion King kinda voice) and runs away.  I think this is freking hillarious and start laughting (wet cat.. get it?) and then I woke up laughing!!!

I wrote this dream down on a notepad the very minute I woke up laughing.. I tend to forget about them when I wake up... it still is funny.... don't you think?

!!! Weirdest thing ever !!!

I had one of the weirdest event I have ever had happen to me, lastnite.

I found myself sleeping next to my ex-girlfriend and I woke up just in time for her boyfriend to walk in. I was blurry as to how I got there. I know that is the only place I didn't want to be in. I am very much over my ex, but still, I panicked.. have I done something... what do I tell him... why am I sleeping next to her... wish I could just dissapear... wish the bed would swollow me up and all of this just go away.

The next thing I know, I was sweating and strugling to breath. I prayed for a miracle. My prayers were answered instantly!!! I woke up. Thank you GOD for making it just a dream. Took me a long time to realise that it was only a dream and thank GOD it wasn't reality. Never been so glad that this was just a dream. It is almost always the other way around.

I still feel gald that it was a dream, as scary as it was!!!!!

Random Thoughts

I make no apologies for the lack of continuity in this blog!!! Hence the title, Random thoughts...

The other day, I was looking at a painting, and it looked average at best, even by my standards, which is not very high BTW. It had the title, "Memories are made to fade..." And it made me think... is it? Are memories really made to fade? I don't think so..

Life, you and I live, should be measured by moments rather than milestones. If memories are made to fade, where is the meaning of our lives?

We are not always fortunate to spend time with out friends, family and loved ones. If it isn't for memories, they will be no different to strangers..

On another random note...

I think I'm incredibly lucky. No, I know that I'm incredibly lucky.

In what aspect you may ask... In all aspects I say...

I wasn't the brightest spark when I was in school, I was good at everything else but studies... Which is the whole point of school.. I understand now... But not then.

There are lots of little incidents that make me feel glad that I am, who I am and what I am.

It was purely by chance that I happen to live in such a wonderful country, New Zealand. If it wasn't for my sibling, I might not have ended up here. Might have been the standard, US of A or may be even in India. Not that it would have been a bad thing, but still..In NZ, I have been presented with soo many opportunities and met soo many wonderful people, I can't imagine my life being anything else..

I am not overly religious, but I do say a silent prayer to keep all my friends and family safe, everyday. I count my lucky stars all the time. I think of my friends and family as lucky stars as well...

I know it doesn't sound like a lot, but it means a lot to me.

Everyone has heard of the line.. Absence makes the heart go fonder... Or something like that. When we are away from our loved ones, sometimes, it is easy to be too occupied with our own lives and not give anyone else a though. I know, cause I was like that. I am finding myself missing all my friends and family more and more. Not that we don't keep in touch or anything.. But I just do.

I believe it is by luck and not fate (if there is such a thing) that you meet certain people, who leave you wondering why they have such a profound effect on your life. Everyone who come into your life, do so, for a reason. They are meant to teach you certain things, even if it the lesson is to learn how to hate someone!!!

I used to be broke a LOT, and I mean a lot... When I was a student. I didn't have the capacity to borrow any money as I had nothing of value that my bank wanted. Sometimes, all I had was a single Dollar in my pocket (and nothing in my bank account). Home was an hours walk away and the dollar was not enough for the bus fare. It was either I buy sweet to munch on and walk or take a gamble and buy a $1.00 lotto ticket (scratch). When ever I have been in this situation, I have always won $2.00, enough for a bus fare. It has never let me down. I never win when I have money and try it. With the danger of sounding like "DR. Phil", this only confirms my "belief" that when you really really need something, someone or something will come to your aid, you just need to believe.

By telling you this, I hope I bring "luck" into your life and I believe that by sharing my luck with you, I can only get luckier :-D

On the other hand, I wonder if the people in my life have anything to do with the "luck", I have in my life.. may be.. maybe not.. but I think so.

SO... are you feeling lucky yet?

Arranged marriage.. Continued

I finally have the venue booked for my wedding.. YEAY!!! Venues are hard to come by in my place. For those who don't know me, I'm from OOTY in the Blue mountains, Nilgiris, Tamilnadu, India. AKA, Queen of the Hill Stations.

OOTY

February is a popular time to get married. I am not sure when in Feb it is going to be. An "ayyar" or in other words, a priest, is sussing out an auspicious day for me in Feb. The invite list is ready. The guests, not including immediate and extended family, is about 600. We are deciding on the lunch menu and the format and the style of my wedding invitation card. I know it is still a little while away.. but planning is good.. rite?

Apparently in India an NRI (Non Resident of India) wedding is a thing to look forward to. We earn in foreign currency and we spend heaps for the wedding (exchange rate is to die for). Some high flyers spend in the range of hundreds of thousands of US dollars. So you can imagine a wedding card embroided with real gold threads and a feast suitable for the Queen herself and not to mention hiring out half the town for your wedding. Mine is no where close to that... but better than most.

I have organised my leave for two months (Feb and march) booked my flights and am looking forward to it.

I used to be dead against arranged marriage. But I have come to realise that there are only a few instances in life, when the siblings can make their parents happy. One of them is a wedding to their taste (or taking their taste into consideration) and ofcourse a girl to their liking. Most other times, we are just a pain in the rear for our parents. We cost them money, heart ache and what not. Ever since I agreed for an arranged marriage, my relationship with my parents have been the best I can ever remember. I am pretty happy about it, but sad at the same time that it has to come to this to have such a good relationship. Never the less, it is all for a good cause.

I am not sure how to explain the way I am feeling. This feeling of getting married and to a total stranger at that (atleast for now) is like knowing that you are going to win a grand prize soon. But you don't know what the prize is or if you will end up appreciating it and liking it for what it is. Given that the prize does not come with a gift exchange card, I am willing to make compromises and change if need be and hope for the best.  I am very excited and almost impatient.  I am ready to settle down and share my life with a certain someone.

I will keep this blog rolling and updated as things happen, so look forward to interesting updates.  keep comming back for more and I really do appreciate your comments.

One thing I forgot to mention, everything has been organised, excpet, no one knows who the "wife to be" is.  

OH! that' s rite, i'm yet to find that certain some one to marry.  Stop laughing!!!

Interesting how things work, everything is organised except for the main characters... :P